Life with 4

I don't take many pictures these days. Poor Lydia will wonder if her newborn days even existed based on the lack of pictures. Poor kid.

Joseph is in another turnaround. I think for the last three kids, he has either just ended a stressful turnaround or started one right when we have a baby. So he is working 3am to 3pm and then picking up Ashton from school. That way, I don't have to worry about feeding Lydia at just the right time in order to get Ashton. Plus it entails loading, unloading, loading again, and unloading again 3 kids to go get her. I could do the car line but it takes FOREVER.

Tanner and Gemma have done well at staying home most days and playing around the house. We try to get out to at least the grocery store, library, playgroup, etc. most days. But we've definitely slowed life WAY down. Tanner really loves to build his robot space machines as seen in the picture above. So he's happy we have more time for that. Ashton is the one who needs to get out of the house every day. Gemma and Tanner are much more content to stay home and play.

Joseph's mom arrives Wednesday night and it will be nice to have some extra help. Since Lydia is strictly bottle fed now, it really frees me up to do whatever is necessary. Plus I scheduled a bajillion doctor appointments while she is here. Lydia will have her one month appointment, Gemma has her heart check up, I have my 6 week check up, a work meeting, and maybe another meeting in there. But I am sure the kids will wear her out every day. They wear me out most days too.

So far, four weeks into having four kids, the biggest difference I see is this. Before, almost always, one kid needed something. One of the three kids needed me or needed help with something. Now, it seems like two of them always do. One of them is almost always Lydia but that's alright. This time around, there are more sibling disputes to settle, more snacks/drinks to get, more clothes to find, etc. I do appreciate Ashton and Tanner's help. They do a lot for us and it definitely is noticeable. But I feel like there are always two kids requesting my presence whereas before, it just felt like one. Maybe when Lydia gets older and more independent, it will go back to one kid the majority of the time.

First Tooth Fairy Visit

Ashton finally lost her first tooth at school this week. It had been loose for about four weeks. The adult tooth is already about halfway in so she doesn't even have a toothless smile really. Even better for family pictures coming up.

She wasn't big on wiggling it or pulling it out, which surprised me. I thought the second it was loose, she would be desperate to pull it out. While at school, a friend encouraged her to take a bite of pretzel with her loose tooth so Ashton did. Well, she didn't realize it came out as she chewed the pretzel and she ended up swallowing the tooth.

She came home and was so excited to tell us. Her teacher encouraged her to write a note to the tooth fairy about why the tooth was missing. Ashton's note was adorable.

Translation: Dear tooth fairy, at school, I lost my tooth. But I accidentally swallowed my tooth. You got two options. You can please choose to give me my money or go into my tummy and get the tooth. Any option you want.

The tooth fairy came that night and gave her a special $2 bill. Ashton was thrilled and took it to school to show her teacher. Thankfully, she didn't lose it!

Tanner turns 4

Tanner turned 4 on January 16th. He was a lucky boy this year and had my sister and brother-in-law visiting for his birthday. He had a great day and was so happy to pick out various parts of his day.

He had speech that morning as it is on Thursdays. His speech therapist was so kind and had a birthday gift ready for him. He played his favorite game with her during the entire session and had a blast.

That morning, my sister arrived and he was thrilled to celebrate with them. I was going to let him skip his nap but he decided to wake up around 6am. I knew it was best for him to nap for everybody's sanity.

We picked up Ashton from school and played CandyLand for most of the afternoon. He chose pizza for dinner and ice cream and cake for dessert. His cake was a galaxy cake and he liked it.

He received LOTS of Legos for his gifts plus a space robot building kit. He's enjoyed playing with all his toys. Tanner is excited to be four. He knows that he gets to go to preschool after summer is over and he can't wait for that.

He visited the doctor this morning. He continues to not grow much since 2 and 3 years of age. He was 36 inches tall at 2 years old, 37 inches at 3. This year, he measured 38.5 inches. So only in the 25th percentile. Poor kid. I keep hoping he hits a huge growth spurt soon to catch up. He is now a little shorter than Ashton was at 4 but weighs a little more than she did.

Typical schedule for Tanner:

Wake up around 7:30am. This is when his clock lights up. He is almost always awake before this but stays in his room until that time.
Take Ashton to school, speech therapy, errands, etc. during the morning time.
Naps still like a champ from 1-3pm
We pick up Ashton at 3:15 so nap time often gets cut short.
He loves playing outside with our neighbors and will do this every day that it's not raining.
Bedtime is at 8pm. His day is fairly predictable and he thrives on that routine.

Here is a recap of Tanner over 4 years.

Tanner's Birthday Interview

How old are you? 4

What is your favorite color? Blue

What is your favorite animal? Snakes

What is your favorite book? Batman Lego books

 What is your favorite show? Captain America

 What do you like to eat? Chicken nuggets

What is your favorite game? CandyLand

What is your favorite thing to do? Hide and Seek Go Tag

Who is your best friend? Emery and Oliver

What do you like to do with Daddy? Play tag

What do you like to do with Mommy? Build robots

What is your favorite restaurant? Hot dogs

Where do you want to go for vacation? Camping

What do you want to be when you grow up? Astronaut

What is your favorite song? Book of Mormon Stories

What is the best time of day? Petting River

What makes you happy? Snacks

Lydia is Here!

Here is Lydia's birth story.

There were several events during the first half or so of January that I wanted to make it to. Lydia obeyed this request by coming less than 12 hours after all those commitments/events ended. First, I wanted to see Ashton sing a solo in church on Jan. 12. Then, I really wanted to be home to celebrate Tanner's birthday on the 16th. My sister and her husband came to visit us on the 16th and my sister ran the Houston Marathon on the 19th. I wanted to watch her run it without the stress of a newborn. And I didn't want to be hospitalized while they were visiting. They left our house around 4:30am on Jan. 20 and Lydia came less than 12 hours after that. It was perfect.

Additionally, 3 of our 4 kids have been born on the same of the month as that year. Ashton is 9/13/13. Tanner is 1/16/16. And now Lydia is 1/20/20. No inductions or planned interventions to make that happen. Gemma's birthday is a little different but she came on Pi Day so it is still easy to remember.

I woke up on the 20th around 12:30am to contractions. They were about 15-20 minutes apart but definitely more painful than the false labor I had been dealing with off and on for a few weeks. I was able to sleep between contractions. When the kids got up around 7:30am, they were still 15 or so minutes apart. Joseph stayed home as I thought it might be the day. By 10am, I was losing hope as they weren't getting much closer together and I was still able to function around the house.

By lunch time, I noticed the contractions were a little closer- about 7-8 minutes apart and I was slowly getting excited. All of a sudden, around 12:30, they started to be about 5 minutes apart. I figured I still had an hour of 5 minute contractions before heading up to the hospital. We put the kids down for naps. We started figuring out who would watch the kids. We decided to have our neighbor come over during nap time and then take them to a friend's home for the afternoon. She couldn't get to our house until about 2:15. I thought I still had plenty of time so wasn't rushed. About 2pm, the contractions moved to 3 minutes apart. We left for the hospital at 2:30 and arrived shortly after 2:45pm. They were still 3 minutes apart in the car so I thought I was golden.

I got to a L&D room and was 6cm dilated. I was so excited that it was real labor and I was staying. They started the IV fluids for an epidural. About 15 minutes later, my water broke. The nurse checked and said, "no time for medication, you're fully dilated. And baby girl is crowning." I was terrified. I have never aspired to give birth naturally and was not prepared for that. The doctor on call was already on the floor and stepped in just in case my doctor wasn't able to make it. All within about 10 minutes, the room was very chaotic with nurses everywhere and my doctor walked in. I kept telling the nurses and Joseph that I was not doing it naturally. There was no way. But they didn't agree. I had no idea what was happening other than the pain was intense and she was coming whether I was ready or not.

She came out with two pushes, thankfully. I kept telling my doctor that I didn't like him very much in the most polite way that I could. The birth experience for me was quite different than the others. I felt out of control as I was not prepared for natural birth. I couldn't really calm down or catch my breath as it was such a rush of activity and emotions. The pain was intense but it was over in 10 minutes or less probably. If I could go back, I'd still wait for the epidural in comparison. While the pain when she was born was rough, I also didn't like feeling all the after-birth and stitches stuff and no epidural. I feel I tore the worst with Lydia, which has been a rougher recovery physically.

Lydia was born at 3:21pm and was our biggest baby by a pound! She was a week early according to my dates but two weeks early according to my doctor. Once again, I don't know where I hide a 9 pound baby. She was also really long at 21.5 inches. She cried a bunch at the beginning but slowly hunkered down to sleep. Lydia nurses well so far and likes her sleep. Already, she seems to cluster feed and then sleep for several hours.

We will head home later today after a 48 hour stay. My other kids and the other hospital always discharged at 24 hours. The extra day has been alright. I slept decently both nights. We did confirm that Lydia's heart is okay. We weren't sure until she was born which way it would go based on ultrasounds during the pregnancy. But her heart sounds great so far.

The big kids came to visit Tuesday night after school. Tanner kept saying, "She is so cute." Ashton loved seeing her as well. It will be fun as I am guessing Ashton will remember baby Lydia. I am not sure she will remember meeting Gemma at the hospital. We had our traditional birthday cake for Lydia. Gemma actually really liked Lydia but hated the hospital. She doesn't do well with medical staff/doctor offices. A few minutes after the kids arrived, a nurse came in to take my vitals and that freaked Gemma out. It took her a while to calm down. But she loved seeing Lydia.

"You are a strong woman"

"You are a strong woman"

Those words were said to me today in passing. I ventured out to the Houston Zoo today with Tanner and Gemma. The zoo hosts free days once a month. We dropped our membership a while back and haven't really missed it. The free days used to be from noon-5, which didn't work with school pick up at 3pm. But now, they do the entire day as free. So we took Ashton to school and left for the zoo. Yes, I am 38 weeks pregnant but I figured I'd either walk and enjoy the zoo or go to the YMCA and walk. There wasn't much difference on my side of things as the mom. Either way, I still have two kids to chase around during the day.

This mother who made the comment was at a playground with her daughter, who was about Tanner's age. She kept remarking how brave and strong I was to take my kids to the zoo with my due date being so soon. I joked that the zoo is right next to the medical center so if something went awry, I was covered.

The last few days/weeks of this pregnancy have brought out some comments by others that have made me feel less as a mother. A older female neighbor saw me yesterday and said, "so was this planned? You know how this happens so now you can make it stop happening." Lots of moms at Ashton's school pick up keep commenting how brave I am to walk to Ashton's school for pick up as opposed to the car line and how crazy I am to consider having four kids. And of course, the typical phrase I get a lot, "You sure have your hands full."

On the way home from the zoo today with two sleeping children in the back, I listened to General Conference talks. One of my favorites is Elder Holland's "Because she is a mother" talk. He shares how truly wonderful it is to welcome children into the world. While it is completely exhausting: physically, mentally (do the 103,394 questions per day ever stop?), and spiritually, as Elder Holland says, "It is worth it then, now, and forever."

While welcoming our fourth child any day now seems daunting at times, I also know we are doing the Lord's work. We are helping to bring to pass immortality and eternal life. I cannot imagine being any more exhausted than I currently am, I know the long nights and long days are worth it. I know that having an eternal family is the best achievement/goal/source of joy. Growing up in a family that would be defined as "broken" and troublesome, I know what the alternative is. I know what divorce does to kids. I know what abuse and neglect do to families. I know the irreparable damage that comes from addictions. I also know the joy that comes when your family is gathered and reads the scriptures together. I know the happiness that you feel when your daughter sings a solo in Church and feels the spirit. I have seen the other side of family life. And I know what I have sacrificed to have children and raise them in the gospel is worth every moment of lost sleep, lost brain cells, and lost dreams.

Until I met Joseph, I never imagined myself getting married and having children. I saw myself working hard at a job that I loved, living in some nice apartment, and having time for myself. And now, I cannot imagine life without sticky hands and sticky faces, without endless child smiles and laughs, without game nights and hours spent reading books and playing with toys.

Now if baby girl could hurry up and make her debut, I would really love to be done with maternity clothes and waddling around the house.

First Sunday in Primary

On January 5, Tanner finally became a Sunbeam. With a January birthday, we knew he'd have an extra year in nursery. However, I'm okay with that. I wasn't in a hurry to move him up any sooner. Plus it allowed Gemma and Tanner to be together for 4 months. He was so excited to be in primary. He learned Book of Mormon Stories from his teacher and has been singing it ever since (non-stop might I add!). He was a proud little Sunbeam on Sunday.

Ashton moved to CTR 6 so has her last year in junior primary! Her best friends from church are in CTR 7 so sadly moved up to senior primary. Her class is a combined CTR 5/6 class and has all boys except her. Thankfully, her teachers are female so she connects with them. I'm guessing next year, she will move up to senior primary with her friends in her class again. For Sunday, she wanted curly hair so we gave it a try with rag rollers. A friend recommended it as it doesn't cost anything and we could see how her hair responded. Well, it responded... with curls! I made the mistake of letting her sleep that night without washing out the curls and hairspray. This led to a rat's nest the next morning. It took almost an hour to brush her hair. She also got lice over Christmas break so dealing with that and lots of snarls in her hair was not a great way to spend break.

And Gemma continues to be in nursery. She has 2020 and 2021 in nursery so she will also be with her little sister for about 5-6 months in 2021. There were new teachers there on Sunday who kept commenting how sweet Gemma was in nursery. She never instigates the arguments/fights supposedly. There are a few more forceful/aggressive toddlers with her so I think she just appears sweet. At home, she definitely stands her ground. Gemma loves to sing "Jesus Wants Me For A Sunbeam" and "Once There Was a Snowman."